WHY ISN'T MARRIAGE A CHOICE??


Again i'm pointing a finger at my culture("the mahaan one" i really don't want it, but i can't help it),  i don't like "one rule" which is bounded to every indian, like the other laws and rules which every one has to adhere it and, it is one of the rule that pisses me off every time i think about it .When someone pressurize something on you, least you are interested in that thing , in the same way indian culture implies the "mandatory rule of marriage", it's must ,whether you want to do it or not, indian culture is made of marriage,,,,marriage is it's synonym, if you're not married then you are surely not good for something, there are following things which people might think if you are not married at an appropriate age.'koi kami hogi ladke/ladki main' 'sagai chooti hui hai' "koi dhang ka rishta mil nahi raha hoga", parents think that it's curse if their children are not getting married and,then after this (when marriage doesn't happen) some parents compromise with any person, if they don 't find an appropriate match and say "chalo shukra hai shadi ho gai".I mean what kind of mentality is this? they spoil their children's future by marrying their children to an unknown person and compromise with their lives..To what extent it is justifiable IS MARRIAGE THAT IMPORTANT?. Why we can't live single throughout the life?. People say that there should be "someone" always with you in the journey of your life in every phase, whether it's good or bad..Why can't we make ourselves that strong so that we can live life easily with ourselves, without needing anyone.If we want kids,, that can happen without marriage also then why to get married? ( I am an INDIAN, aise bolne se he paap laga gya muje i guess), marriage is nothing, its just the destroyer of life.I have heard the words like "marital bliss" but never felt it.May be i am saying like this because i have not seen the perfect example of happy married couple yet, always seen the bad side of it.

 There are some things which i hate about the marriage (in india) which are as follows,

ONE HAS TO COMPROMISE A LOT, one could be husband or could be wife.Why to compromise.?. Why to spoil your happiness for the sake of other's happiness, why we have to change for someone.If we are changing for someone by our will then its completely alright but marriage forces you to do that for other person.We should not change if we don't want to, there should not be any social pressure for this.

 FIGHTS, Fights happens in every relationship, be it a sister or brother or between friends etc, but a tiff between a husband and wife is completely different, it affects the whole society, in our patriarchal society generally woman has to suffer the wrong consequences of fights, sometimes husband shouts, beats his wife up and abuses in front of the family and especially kids who are the most affected creatures.If they see these things , they grow up with the same attitude.If our kids will learn this then we are seeing the same future without changes.

YOU LOOSE YOUR IDENTITY,you are no longer "YOU"  after marriage, you are being addressed by either someones wife, husband, mother father etc, your self no more exists.You surrender yourself completely to the society, to the family, to every relationship etc and you forget who you are? and who you want to be.You give everything for the sake of society.

WOMAN ARE THE WORST SUFFERER,Most affected section of society is WOMEN in marriage, i don't wanna explain it how and why(read my article "domestic violence").?

I know i am talking weirdly at some places as i am an indian and i have grown up seeing this, but i have a problem that why it is compulsory? .It should be optional and if optional then there should be no age limit.People should adopt the free attitude towards marriage,a liberal one though,and if someone wants to come out of the marriage then people should not make it a big issue out of it.They should understand that every time you can't hear and bear what society wants from you, inner contentment is also very important.So you should marry when you think it's the right time and the right person, not by any parental force.


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